Everybody meets Raymond

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Saturday, June 17, 2006

我究竟係一個點樣既人?

我想update 下我呢個blog, 但又唔知寫乜好, 所以, 我會諗到乜就寫乜, 唔明既話請見諒.

之前話要早瞓, 我真係早瞓左一輪咖, 曾經試諣連續幾日點幾鐘就瞓. 但係早瞓左之後, 反而個人還攰左, 後來慢慢, 又變番三點瞓, 近排好返啲, 兩點半左右. 希望遲啲會再好啲啦..

我究竟係一個點樣既人? 我諗我自己都唔係好明白自己. 我知我係一個幾優悠不斷既人. 我諗係原於我對好多野都無信心, 對自己, 對人, 對將來, 對已知既野, 未知既野, 甚至對神, 我都自問係一個少信的人. 就算對着自己明明是有信心的事, 我也多數只會說到99%. 因為, 我總覺得, 沒有什麼事是絕對的. 

例如我以前問你, 太陽系究竟有幾多粒行星, 以前一定實牙實齒答九粒. 邊度會諗到, 今時今日連啲天文學家都要爭論係八粒,九粒,十粒,定係廿三粒?

一方面, 我知道, 沒有事我可以肯定,或者控制, 甚麼事也不會完全在掌握之中, 但同時, 我亦因為腦裏滿是uncertainties,令我凡事都考慮更多, 所有pros and cons,所要risk的是什麼,有幾大risk,後果,影響, 就算明知我想多少, 也不能全盤算盡,但就是控制不了自己的大腦.

有人會覺得我唔係咁諗野.因為我乜都好似無所謂咁. 但相反,有時我會覺得自己諗得太多.其實有時,我都真係覺得好辛苦. 我自己都唔想.

我很重視跟別人的承諾. 我盡可能, 都會盡力去實踐. 但是, 有時,就是因為我對自己, 對環境沒有一百份之一百的信心, 我的承諾很多時都是應承別人我盡力去做某件事. 有些人可能會覺得我如此承諾好無誠意.但是,相反,在我來說,我就是對誠諾認真才會這樣說. 在這個範疇上, 我亦清楚自己的弱點. 在時間上, 我也不知怎的, 常常遲到. 這是一個我可以更盡力去兌現承諾的地方.(對等過我既朋友, 衷心再說聲, sorry)

唉, 有時諗得太多, 自己都唔想. 我是不是一個很T(hnking)的人? 偏偏那時做測驗我是F(eeling)的. 自己也會覺得自己有好F既時候. 好多時都會去feel人地既feeling. 去設身處地, 去鄧人乜鄧人物. 自己有時也會因為別人的感覺而做決定. 但我自問對這方面的我未係好了解. 我是否真的這麼複雜? 

b/s, friends, 你地覺得我係個點既人?may you let me know? 有時諗下, 先排好多人都有的Johari Windows 我都應該整返個, 等我知道下朋友點睇我.

我究竟係一個點樣既人 ?

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(sorry, 一係唔寫, 一寫就寫到水蛇春咁長.. 有感而發,sorry)其實仲有野寫,但實在太長啦.
我咁耐無寫,唔知我個blog仲有無人睇?

2 Comments:

  • hey Ray, everyone have our own weakness parts, that we always don't have confident to solve or face. Unless we have support friends beside to keep on encouraging us all the time....
    I do understand boys always not easy to share or express their unhappy side or feeling to his friends. Coz is man natural behavior. But if you try to speak one or two sentence to your trusties, you will feel better, no need long conversation. Coz I doubt you friends do understand.

    I think Raymond is a well planner and a gentle team leader. He does make his cell members maintance a solid support to each other. Do creat soft flow to express our weaknesses. Regarding the time managment that you always late, humm...don't force yourself too hard, coz I was a time restraighted person before, which make me very very tence and tight, which I really don't like that kind of feeling. Therefore, I've learn to be a late person, it calms myself a bit.
    cheers up

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:43 PM, June 27, 2006  

  • Don't worry. You still have readers, at least I am one of those. Will give you comments after my careful consideration. ^_^

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2:19 PM, July 07, 2006  

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